In the wonder of Christmas,
may you find peace.
In the beauty of Christmas,
may you find hope.
In the love of Christmas,
may you find joy.
My girls and I wish you a joyous holiday!
Merry Christmas!
In the wonder of Christmas,
may you find peace.
In the beauty of Christmas,
may you find hope.
In the love of Christmas,
may you find joy.
My girls and I wish you a joyous holiday!
Merry Christmas!
Some good news!
Miss Chipmunk Cheeks does not have heart disease! Yay!! She has turbulent blood flow in her right ventricle. The cardiologist said it’s not a cause for concern.
And we all breathed a sigh of relief! Okay, I breathed a sigh of relief. Jool was completely unconcerned about anything except eating because “you know they didn’t feed me at the vet clinic, Mom!”
Ahem. Yes, Jujubes, I do know they “didn’t feed” you. Yeah. Okay. We’ll go with that.
And then some not-so-good news
The Buglet, on the other hand? Well, we still don’t know. Her thyroid test result was in that lovely “gray area.” More concerning, though, was that her calcium level was elevated. That’s often a sign of cancer.
She went back to the vet today for more tests: more blood drawn for a different thyroid test (free T4, for those of you keeping score at home) and X-rays of her entire body to look for tumors.
Bless those vet techs’ hearts! I really feel for them. To say that Catherine the Great is not a good patient is putting it ever so mildly. I fear they got a taste of my little Tasmanian devil today!
We’re encouraged that there were no tumors on the X-rays…but that means we still don’t know why her calcium level was too high. There may be more tests in her future.
I guess I should trim Katie’s nails so she can’t completely rip a vet tech to shreds when she gets fed up with being poked and prodded!
Meanwhile, back on the ranch…
The cooler weather has the girls making laps around the back yard like they were running the Indy 500. With puppy tackles instead of spectacular crashes, thank goodness. Although I have to say, the puppy tackles are pretty spectacular!
Jool stormed the door when I got home, running outside as I was coming in with Katie. I can just picture her: “Heeeeyyy…Mom’s got Katie’s crate in one hand and a purse and a bag in the other. No way she will think to block me from zipping outside for some fresh air!” ZOOM!!
Since a) it was already dark outside, b) I saw the neighborhood coyote one street over as I was rounding the corner, and c) my sweet little calico kitty practically glows in the dark, I tracked down the flashlight (WHY is the flashlight NEVER where it’s supposed to be??) and hunted that little girl down. Surprisingly, she made it easy for me. There must’ve been coyote scent in the air.
And right now? Well, Ginny’s got the itchy-butt and is wallowing all over the sofa and growling at it. Her itchy-butt, not the sofa. That girl, she’s always good for a laugh!
In a holding pattern. Waiting. Not-knowing. These are things I’m not very good at.
Waiting on test results makes me alternately anxious and cranky. I imagine worst-case scenarios, my mind a wild, undisciplined child on a sugar high soaring up-up-up. The inevitable spectacular crash follows. With tears. Lots and lots of tears.
But wait is all I can do.
Wait on the cardiologist’s review of Jool’s echocardiogram.
Wait on Katie’s blood test results. (Is she a good dieter, or is she sick??)
Just wait.
And trust.
Because you don’t belong to me.
And neither do you.
God has trusted me to care for you, to love you, to make sure you have plenty of dogs to torment and things to rip to shreds. But only for a little while.
However long that little while is, I’ll take it.
We humans sure seem to hold onto memories of bad things, don’t we? Not only the dates, but also the sights, sounds, and smells. I think that’s why Alan Jackson’s song resonates with me.
I remember exactly where I was.
I was driving down MacArthur Boulevard on my way to work. It was a bright, sunny day. I was headed to work later than usual, so there was almost no traffic. My radio was tuned to the classical music station. I wasn’t paying much attention to it, although I thought it was odd that the news segment was going on and on. Then I heard them say something about an airplane crashing in Pennsylvania. And that they didn’t know if it was related to the three other airplanes. Confused, I quickly switched the station to NPR to get the whole story.
I remember crying. A lot.
I remember feeling utterly helpless, useless.
I remember checking with Michele to see if her brother was okay.
I remember scouring the news for word that someone had been found alive in the rubble.
I remember going to church that Sunday and feeling like God had wrapped me up in his arms and wasn’t ever going to let me go.
I remember, in the days and weeks that followed, checking the names of those lost, hoping I wouldn’t see my friend’s name, and the sense of relief when, day after day, I didn’t.
I remember hearing stories of heroism, of people phoning their loved ones to say good-bye.
I remember not being able to laugh for the longest time.
I remember dear friends, all of us visibly shaken, getting together for lunch or to chat, just checking in, making sure we were all as okay as we could be.
I remember struggling to figure out what “normal” was and how I could get there.
Today, 10 years later, my “normal” doesn’t look anything like I envisioned then. I’m getting pretty good at facing new challenges and recovering from life’s sucker-punches. Which, frankly, more than annoys me.
But I keep pushing on, anyway.
This life is worth the effort.